Remembering Michael Doyle

Jennifer Hammond Landau --"Michael believed in me!"

Well, been thinking for days about Michael, and, of all the many things I could say, what is at the core.

Michael believed in me. That is it. That was....and still is.... the magic of Michael Doyle. Believed in us each, I suspect, and by extension, the capacity of the group.

From the first Group Graphics workshop with David, Sandra and Geoff and the early years doing graphic recording, working both with Interaction’s methodology and the Sibbet & Associates Group Graphic process.....to the time Michael showed up as adjunct faculty in my MSOD program, where again I was struggling to integrate verbal and visual process, the mainstream and the cutting edge. Phenomenal support and acknowledgment from Michael to be who I was, even when I didn’t know who I was.

My last contact with Michael was probably 3 years ago, about suits for a high school production of Guys & Dolls. What a delightful, odd memory now rather than a time wheeling and dealing in a meeting room!

Michael believed in the power of the collective and the team, and yet also the individual. Contradictory and complimentary. Michael opened doors, was demanding, trusted my creativity, challenged my assumptions, was presumptuous, thought big, and showed me that the best facilitation at times breaks all the rules, even the ones written in the book.

What a life....what a legacy!

Jennifer Hammond Landau

David Straus-- Truly "greater than life"

One of the tragedies of Michael’s death, for me, is the finality and impossibility of reaching closure and reconciliation. It is generally known that the ending of our partnership was fraught with anger and recrimination and, despite several attempts, we were never able to put the past to rest.

Michael and I had such a rich partnership and friendship. Michael stood in as father-of-the-bride at my wedding, juggled fire at my daughter’s birthday party, and participated in countless family outings.  We were co-explorers in the emerging fields of collaborative problem solving and non-adversarial dispute resolution. Side-by-side we built Interaction Associates and the Center for Collaborative Problem Solving. At our best, we applied complimentary skills and worked well together. At our worst, we were competitive, jealous, and petty.

So I must try to bring closure this complex relationship on my own and with mutual friends. I, too, want to remember Michael at his best - full of life and energy and creativity; capable of having four wisdom teeth pulled and then proceeding to conduct a day-long workshop; cooking three full Gourmet menus when one would have been enough. Michael was truly “greater than life” and that is how I will remember him.

David

Dennis Jaffee -- "Not a week without some memory"

Dear Juli,
I was so shocked and saddened to hear about Michael. Even without being in close touch, in my life, and all around us, he was such a presence or engagement, love and care. I don’t think a week went by when some idea, memory or story form him didn’t come up for me. He was a real inspiration to me, a person who I looked to in so many ways. Our time working together was very special and I have always felt fortunate to have been “picked” to be on the team. We were all making it up as we moved along, but it was wonderful. I think that I remember each and every lunch, coffee and dinner that we had together, just because there was never an encounter with Michael that was not memorable. He gave in so many ways, and to so many people, and I am very fortunate to have been one of them.

I look forward to sharing some time with you this Saturday, and also to keeping you in our lives as we all move forward.
With love,
Dennis

Dennis T. Jaffe, Ph.D.
764 Ashbury St.
San Francisco, CA 94117
415-665-8699
415-819-9489 (cell)
dennisjaffe.com

Dave Gray to Michael -- "Bon Voyage"

Michael,

I heard that you are dead. I couldn't believe it and at the same time I knew that it was true. So I am sitting here, trying to write something to you, for you, about you, and I can't think where to begin. You're impossible to describe.

You are a gentle wind that blows through my life, wherever I am. You support me and you give me strength. Whenever I have an adventure or a special experience, I wish you were with me to share it. And because I wish it, you are there.

You are the man I want to be.

Do you remember one time when you were visiting me in St. Louis and I said something about the time zones and jet lag? You said "I don't do time zones. Wherever I am, that's the time I'm on." And it's true, wherever you go, you live in the moment. And now I think you are in some other moment. But I think you will read this.

The first time I met you I remember that you said "let's play together." And we did play together didn't we? We had some wonderful times and you were always an amazing host. I only wish we could have done it more. I was looking forward to seeing you in Spain this spring.

No matter what, you always made time for me, and I always felt special and blessed to be with you.

You taught me by your example, to approach everything with fearlessness, curiousity and love. You taught me "back away smiling!"

I have been trying to think of a way to honor you, and I think it is to be the person you always knew I could be, even when I did not. To believe in people and bring out the best in them. To find love always, and work with love. Above all, just to be there and to make time.

Strangely, the last words you wrote to me were "Bon Voyage!!" Bon Voyage to you Michael and a big hug. You are my brother. I love you and I miss you and I hope I will see you again. You live in my heart.

Your brother,

Dave

--
Dave Gray
Founder and CEO
XPLANE | www.xplane.com
dgray@xplane.com

Sam Kaner -- Let's Honor Michael at Best In The West

Hi David,

Thanks for doing this blog.

I have a couple of things to contribute.   

One of them is a copy of the Foreword to our Facilitating book in 1996, which Michael wrote in 1996.   We recently finished our second edition, and I found myself re-reading Michael's work and thinking, "wow, that was a really beautiful piece he wrote."   Even though it was 11 years ago, the wisdom ran through every page.

Another thing I would be happy to contribute is this idea:   What do you think of co-sponsoring an event at this year's Best In the West, in Michael's honor? 

Poem upon Michael's Birthday -2005

This is a poem that I wrote for Michael's Birthday in 2005. This poem came to me all at once and  I shared it with Michael and a small group of friends. Michael loved the poem and he told me he wanted to frame it because it meant so much to him.

Juli asked me to read this poem at the cremation ceremony and at the open house following the ceremony. I hope that this poem resonates with you as well.

Meredith Beam

Does he know?

Soulful blue eyes...
they have a reverence
and a way of connecting
to your very Being.

The concentration,
when he chooses,
can be a penetration of the heart,
sooooo deep,
that there is a dare!
A dare to merge,
to be complete,
in the very dwelling
of your own
sweet
chamber of compassion.

But don’t let this apostle fool you...
Quixote, Bacchus,
MacDougal’s fastball
and Macbeth all exist
in this man’s soul!

He is, as they say,
a man for all seasons
and one who,
at his best,
will drown your fears,
heal your angst,
and reframe your psyche.

This is why we love him!

So.... I wonder...
does he know this?

Can he take these words
into his heart
and let them
rest there...
until they absorb
all misgivings...
and transform them
into the golden latif
of his true, pure
heart essence?

This is my prayer on the day
of his precious birth!

Love
Meredith

My Dinner With Michael

I've spent the last few days remembering Michael Doyle and honoring his incredible contribution to my life. In the process I uncovered a long piece I wrote following an evening with Michael in 1990 that reminded me of the movie, My Dinner with Andre. Michael and I had that kind of relationship, and I share it here with his community as a window into the complex personal journey that those of us pursuing careers in change consulting embrace. You can download it here or from the "Michael's Writing" section of this blog.

My Dinner with Michael, by David Sibbet

Michael's Skywriting

Only hours after hearing of Michaels' death, I was getting streaming messages from him... visual ones, of course, since it was he who taught me EVERYthing I know as a Graphic Recorder... and it was through the marker on paper that we were first introduced. But, what I've learned from Michael isn't about how to hold nine pens in your left hand.
I hesitated to share these visual messages from him since his death, but he's continually sending them, and I mean that literally, so here goes.

On Monday night, Michael was a comet. I mean a really speeding, stretching-out-a-long-tail-of-light-type comet. He was grinning so big, his face turned into blinding white light, and he was screaming in that incredibly real, insanely passionate voice "IT"S SO BEAUTIFUL UP HERE, JULI!!!" He was shooting across the sky, darting and leaving beautiful trails behind him, laughing with his arms out like a cartoon superman. His tears of excitement were turning into streams of more light. He was so incredibly jazzed at all he could see/know/feel/understand that he had been searching for for eons, not just one lifetime. This image zooomed past me about every hour, and then he faded into the depth of the universe.

 

Bob Horn Remembers Michael in 1980

Bob Horn came over to dinner tonight and told me this story that I thought deserved to be posted.

"The first time I met Michael was in 1980 at the first Group Graphics workshop ever held by David Sibbet, Geoff Ball and Sandra Florstedt. Michael was in the breakout group I happened to select. He was going to be the facilitator. I had just formed my company, Information Mapping a few years before. I’d been to a lot of board meetings, and working in non-profits. I’d also been part of the human potential movement in those days, so I was familiar with people leading groups in ways that weren’t Robert’s Rules of Orders. But when I went out into this breakout with Michael, he started facilitated the group. That is when I first recognized that facilitation was really different and a skill. Because things were happening in the group that were just amazing."

Obituary for Michael

Doyle, Michael

Author and social architect
San Francisco – Michael Doyle died suddenly on Jan. 29, 2007
Born Dec. 21, 1942 in Cincinnati, Ohio, he spent most of his life in San Francisco.

Michael created a whole new field of collaborative strategic planning, facilitation, large-scale change in multi-sector global organizations & he contributed to fundamentally new approaches to city planning. He brought a level of consciousness, creativity and intuition to a field that had been largely analytical. He was an entrepreneur (Co-Founder, Interaction Associates); co-author (How to Make Meetings Work, with over 800,000 copies in print in ten languages), architect and innovator. He brought ideas that were radical for their times that have now become the standard for planning and development. Above all, he brought his immense spirit and the human element into his work. He was an elder mentor to young people. Most recently he turned his passions and his considerable genius to addressing the issues around global warming, developing nations and problems of children caught in the foster care system.