Why I Go On Vision Quests

For many years, since I turned 43, I have taken time every couple of years to go into the wilderness and seek guidance. In my work, exposed to so much that is complex and sometimes troubling, and in these times, which are truly unparalleled in their challenges, I need the deepest inner guidance possible. So I am going again this next week, returning to Joshua Tree National Monument to spend some time alone in the desert.

I will be following the traditional form of the vision quest, long practiced by indigenous peoples. It involves preparation over several months, deepening my reasons for going. In March I took a walk about from sunrise to sunset in the Marin Headlands, asking for clarity about the reasons for questing.In early April  I spent time visioning at a retreat in Baltimore and created a "hero's journey" story about my reasons for going. Then on April 26 I will join Chayim Barton and Brian Winkler, two Jungian counselors with extensive experience leading such activities, and six other questers in the desert.  I can't wait!!

On this quest we will begin by spending a couple of days disengaging and sharing our reasons for going, sitting in circle and sharing in a practice of "deep dialogue." Then we will all spend three days completely alone, drinking only water, and staying up the last night calling for a vision. We return to two days of re-integration and sharing stories from our time alone.

This will be my seventh quest with groups. I have gone a half dozen times alone before that, mostly to the Eastern Sierra where I was raised. Invariably the lessons are deep and the guidance powerful. I will be, no doubt, writing and sharing about this time. But here, before I go, I would like to take the unusual step of publically sharing the letter of intention that I wrote in regard to this particular quest. This is a deeply personal piece of writing, and I had no intention of sharing it when I wrote it, but I think that in these times it is important for people like myself to bring forward the practices that sustain us, even if they seem strange or unfamiliar. It is only through our sharing that we will come to discover the deep well of mystery and inspiration that is the human journey, and the fountains of courage and creativity that are gifted to us when we embrace our deep connections to all living things.

I myself was raised Christian, by a minister father who deeply respected nature as a teacher and reflection of God, yea the body of God. I remain deeply inspired by the teachings and example of Jesus of Nazareth. I have also studied and practiced Tibetan Buddhism, the six yogas of Naropa as taught by Lama Tubten Yeshi through his student Chayim Barton. And for years I have practiced in the manner of the Native Americans, holding all of life as sacred and working for the good of all my relations. I believe that finding a bridge between these great traditions is part of my path this time on Earth. That is another reason why I have chosen to share this journey more openly this time around.

In this practice we questers take names that point at the "medicines" or lessons we are carrying in our lives, and I use that name in this communication.

My medicine name is Sunseed Turtlebone, Blessed by the Spirits of Crumbling Trees. My practice is to walk the wheel in the old way. My practice is to embrace nature in its wildness and listen to its voices and its messages. My practice is to stop my world of busyness and tune into the depths, the breadths, the polyphonies of sacred space, and trust what comes. This is why I quest.

I am currently in a transition process whose arc is several years, and will take me from being the focal leader of my company, The Grove Consultants International, to being a true elder—free of the power of position, open to working in a less restricted way in support of the people and the transformations that are happening in our time.

It is a challenging thing, to dis-identify from something I love, and turn away from competencies that have many years of development embedded in them, and answer the call of service… But I am called….

I go to the desert to re-ground, to re-center, and spend time envisioning where we are headed as a people, as a land, and as a community. It is important that my vision be clear and my commitment deep.

I know we, as humans, cannot predict the future in detail, but I do believe that the larger patterns are already in play, and can be heard, felt and experienced in the calm and spaciousness of a vision quest. I am called to be a voice for what needs to emerge in our time, to be a midwife and an interpreter, a steward and a seedsman. In that regard it is very important to me that I serve my higher Self, and the Great Spirit, and not the chimera of my egoic self.

So my intention for this quest is to connect deeply with what is emerging for me and for us as a people, and experience it so powerfully that serving its birth will be as natural as a mother’s love. I ask to look into the face of my own newborn, and return to the East where I first went at Joshua tree. On prior quests I have embraced my spiritual child, I have experienced the power and danger of my dark soul and accepted its gifts, I have found, in my waking dreams, a new guide in honu, the turtle, and with these insights come to face the beast of our consumptive culture. And as I’ve increasingly stepped into the light of my own guidance in this struggle, I find myself surrounded by kindred souls. We are roping up and supporting each other in moving into this new time. So ready, I call for my assignments, I open to the voices on the wind. I accept that it is time to pray for the guidance available to us all in times of need. This time I am questing for my people.

I have spoken.

Sunseed Turtlebone, Blessed by the Spirits of Crumbling Trees

Comments

[Allan]

I was moved by your comments and will be thinking of you in the days to follow. Fair winds, Allan.

[Lance Dublin]

As usual, your words are powerful and you move me with them. You David are a gift to us all! Thank you. Your friend and earth-mate, Lance

[Shaman]

Sunseed Turtlebone, my heart beats with the sacred calling to the Vision at Joshua Tree, a holy place. I listen to the drum beating nature's sounds in the silence. I hear the truth of your intention to return as newborn stripping away the identities of the mini-me's falsehood. Returning to the truth of who you are, I honor your sharing in this way. Many thanks.
On a personal note, I ran into Ann Marie Sayers at the People of the Earth in America Conference last Sunday. Way cool. Till we meet again - Vaya con Dios.

[Jim Ewing]

I shall carry your elegant intentions with me over the days ahead. May you find all you seek. Thanks for your continued inspiration. You have the magic.

Jim

[Lightning Dove]

Dearest Brother Turtlebone, Blessed by the Spirits of Crumbling Trees...

I just received a touching UTube recommendation from my sister. It is "Take me with Alan" ("Take Me with You" - song written by actor Alan Rickman, sung by Elizabeth Fraser)it is so sweet. Then I read your request to be held as you move into your vision quest...again. I honor you for keeping your questing fresh and alive...looking forward to new awakenings in this time of profound change both personal and global. As your sister, I will hold you with love and be with you in spirit ...as my brother, I hope you will take me, and all of us, with you into your dream and share your stories, as only you can do, when you return.
Mother... Father... God...speak to this Sacred Being what is needed, fill his heart with peace and the stillness You/We are,and return him to us anew...with the clarity and joy of knowing his next steps in serving you and all of Life. I am excited for you, Dear One...All blessings, Dove

[barbara waugh]

Dear David,

I breathe more deeply with every word i read of your intention and the very air is clearer, lighter, brighter. I will be with you dear heart! To think a Presbyterian PK turned into you! all things are possible for them that love...
love,
barb

[Wolfie]

My dearest friend, Sunseed Turtle-Bone Blessed by the Spirits of Crumbling Trees...

Though I shall not be at the beach with everyone on your purpose circle night, I shall be holding you and the others strongly in prayer while I am in Washington. Indeed, your circle shall be held by a much wider group both physically and spiritually far and wide.

I look forward to stories of your incorporation and I shall hold you all in my heart with prayers for a safe and fulfilling journey that will be both mysterious and enlightening.

Pray hard for our people and pray even harder for our most sacred of mothers - mother earth and father sky. Indeed, these times call to all of us to use the medicines we've all been blessed with.

Yahete (Yacqui-"from my heart")
Lady Red Wolf Tortuga - Wolfie

[Wrensong]

Hi David,
As usual you inspire me to marry intention with occupation. I'll be thinking of you in the desert's open dry air as I wander the streets of rainy London.
Yours in spirit,
Wrensong

[Amy Lenzo]

Dear One,

I too hold you in my heart as you journey forth for us all.

I look forward to your return and to hearing what you have learned in the desert, as I know it will have meaning for me too.

Amy

[Juana]

My Brother . . . make your steps plain and clear . . . i will soon look to find them and follow. As always, I carry the light of your Spirit in my heart space and send you Peace.